Essex Girls' Limericks

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Essex Girls Limericks

This booklet is a celebration of Essex Girls and some of the lovely-named places where they live.

Who lives in Tittymouse Wood, Twitty Fee and Twizzlefoot Bridge? What happened to the ladies of Beaumont-cum-Moze, Hatfield Broad Oak and Stanstead Mountfitchet? What rhymes with Steeple Bumpstead, Shellow Bowells, Wendens Ambo and Tolleshunt d'Arcy? These and a hundred more posers can all be solved if you buy this little book, and you'll be helping EWAG to support some of the less fortunate Essex girls and women, at the same time.

They cried: ‘what a funny address!’
To a girl from the Isle of Foulness.
She answered quite smugly:
‘I’m neither Mucking nor Ugley,
Nor go Messing about when I dress’.

A milkmaid from Chadwell St. Mary
Decided her legs were too hairy.
So she scrubbed them with milk
‘Til her skin was like silk,
And now she’s the belle of the dairy.

Our Sharon went on a blind date
With a chap who’d a chimp in a crate.
While they sat ‘neath a tree
The chimp poured them tea
And - - - - - - -*

*to find out, buy the book!

All the characters are fictional and any similarity is purely accidental.